“How am I ever going to be old and wise if I’m not young and crazy? That is the thought that comes to mind when I am afraid. I have a constant fear of being taken or harmed when I am alone. It’s a real fear that many women have. We have been told since we were little to never go anywhere alone. There are movies, books, podcasts, and magazine articles about the terrible things that happen to women. As women we are depicted as delicate and defenseless. Let me tell you something, I know many girls who could totally kick some dude butt! That being said, on average, a woman is a lot smaller, shorter, and less strong than a big ole man. So here lies the problem. How do I get things done alone and not get kidnapped, murdered, assaulted, harassed, or beat up? I have no idea, so what do I do? I do them anyways. I cannot control this crazy world but I can keep on living. If I want to go somewhere alone, I do. I go alone and keep my head on a constant swivel and I tell myself I can totally kick someone butt if needed. Educate yourself on being safe!
It is terrible that as women, we live in constant fear of the people around us. Sadly I’m sure our assumptions about people are not wrong. But the majority of people are not going to hurt you. That is the reality of our fear. The majority of people that we come in contact while alone will not hurt us. I meet new people every day at my job. I can honestly say you cannot judge a person by the way the look. Some people look interesting but are truly the sweetest. Then there are the ones who look perfectly fine but are super creepy. So how do we decide who to doge and who to befriend? My friend Haley says, “Keep on doing what you are doing until you feel afraid or uneasy.” Then that is when you should bolt. Do not let your fear decide what you are going to do! When did we start letting something tell us how to live our life? Because that is what your fear is doing right now.
PERSONAL STORY: If we are FB or Insta friends you already know this but keep on reading. I woke up today and decided today was the day I was going to go kayaking alone. I was going to take Britton’s truck, load the (very heavy) kayak into it, secure it, and go to the lake for a few hours ALONE! So I ate breakfast, read some horror stories about people getting assaulted on hikes, watched safety videos, pinned some safety things on Pinterest, and pumped myself up for a day alone. The first feat was getting the kayak in the truck; I hope no one was watching because I looked like a total fool. Then I drove to the lake. I parked my car and just sat there shaking for a few minutes. (SEE! I told you I have a real fear of people) I scoped out the people and in my head I rated each one on a scale from nice to murderer. They were all in the nice but creepy range of course. Then an old lady pulled up and started fishing. I thought if this old lady can do it, I can do it. So I hopped out of the truck, put my, I’m not afraid face on and launched the kayak! After launching the kayak I mumbled, “YES I DID IT” under my breath! It may seem like something simple but I totally faced my fear today and it felt amazing. I spent 3 hours on the lake and then returned home safely to go to work. No one talked to me and I did not feel unsafe at all.
So the moral to this long story is, don’t let fear stop you. If you want to do something alone and you are afraid, list the pros and cons then make a decision. Bring safety gear and scout out where you are going. I went to the lake multiple days and looked at who is there at certain times and where the best place to park and launch was. Be careful but be you! If you think something is really dangerous then do not freaking do it! But if you do your research, educate yourself, and are confident you can be safe then do it ladies!
BE A BRAVE AND PROUD WOMAN! BE EVERYTHING YOU CAN BE! DO NOT LET FEAR CONTROL YOU! As my Grandmother would say, “Always remember stranger danger!” It’s a real thing and a serious thing. As women we should have a healthy fear to keep us safe, but don’t let that healthy fear turn into something else. You are strong, you are adventurous, and you are amazing! YOU CAN DO IT! Whatever your fear is, whether its people, a test coming up, driving, or maybe just being you, you can do it!